The Tiger's Essential KUC guide to Raving with Cliques

An age old tradition of Kisii Uni is that folks tend to eat in cliques, walk in cliques, shag in cliques, shit in cliques and do just about everything else in cliques. They also rave in cliques.

So here is a manual I wish I had a couple of months back:

Chomba & Associates
Consists of Chomba na Wacoasti kadhaa. Usually drama free. Their poison of choice varies but they usually do Viceroy, beers and generally whatever their dates be partaking of. Lots of chickas always be hanging around their table. Generally steer clear of pub drama.

Rave with them when: Your grasp of Coastal Swa is above par and you want to get laid

Fred, Keter,Robbie & Associates a.k.a Walevi wa Kayole
Allsopps,Ng'ang'o,Pilsner na kadhalika. I mean these folks will drink anything and I mean anything to get high.
Usually carrying 14 pints of Naps in their bellies. Generally never walk away from a Pub Brawl

Rave with them when: Your life is in mortal danger, you have a terminal illness and you "don't care"

Kina Tony
You might or might not get into a pub brawl. You might or might not have to cover their cab fare back. You might or might not get laid. You might or might not end up with liquor in your hair

Rave with them when: You feel like taking chances



Bendah &Co.
Used to really ball back when a cat named Abel used to be around.
They drama, I mean drama be their middle name. B.O.B will attempt to chock chicks, Yobrah always up to no good pimping and hustling numbers from chicks, Zish be jumping off roofs. I mean these cats Rave by the words of Party like a Rockstar.
Always keep their liquor on the legit side. Trust em to keep it herbal too.

Rave With Them When: You need some Drama in your life or when Abel is around


Mondoh,Wahome & Macharia
Obsessed with swag. Except swag seems to mean something different to them than it does to other Homo sapiens.
Guarantee you a quiet night out on the rave. Beers, Viceroy and the occasional tiger blood be their poisons of choice.
Rave with them when: You want "swag" real or imagined or you are eyeing a Kiuk chick.

Joash etc
Well nobody knows the rest of them niggas in the clique. If you bring a date chances are you will go back without her.
Real Hyena blood these ones got. Trust their table to always have a chicka or two.

Rave with them when: You are looking for a quiet time out. And are dateless

Freshers
Most confused and loudest bunch in the club.
Rarely go out and when they do they spend half the night dissing the joint. Save for the odd cool cat, they fuck up the whole. Drink mostly beers. That�s two for their broke asses, at which point they excessive drunk and two Black Ices for their date.

Rave with them when: You want to commit social suicide